WARNING: Sappy Post
It is very late, and I can't sleep, so I thought a little writing might set my mind at ease. I'm down in CT, visiting my grandmother. I love her so much. We have a very special bond, and while grandmothers generally don't admit to having a "favorite" grandson, I think I come pretty close.There was a time a few years back when she was very sick (shingles), and was terribly depressed because she was afraid that she wouldn't be able to do her vegetable garden that year. It has always been her passion, and at her age it had almost become her reason for being. She had begun to despair and to lose her will to live. I felt like I had to do something, so I did all the work in the garden by her instructions, and it ended up being one of the best years ever for the garden. She became more positive about life again, and I truly believe that it helped her pull through the illness. She's always said that she'll never forget what I did for her that year, which makes me feel really good.
She is such an amazing and beautiful person, and it hurts me in the deepest fibers of my being to see the pain she is constantly in (physically). For the last several years her body has sort of been falling apart. As soon as one pain is healed, another appears. Mentally, she is still razor sharp, and her memory is excellent. I think that in the last few years I've heard more stories from her about her past than I ever did in all the years before. She was never "book smart," but she's always had the sort of wisdom that no book can teach. She has a natural, simple outlook on life that has allowed her to enjoy life to the fullest. She would be a great Taoist.
My grandmother always told me that she is ready to go when it's her time to die, and it's always bothered me when she said that. But she knows that she's going to heaven, and that she'll be reunited with my grandfather, so why should anyone be sad when that day comes? My grandfather died when my mom was in high school, and as far as I know my grandmother has never been seriously involved with another man since. I always had the impression that she had found her perfect love, and no longer felt a need to seek out another. My grandfather had the same birthday as me, so perhaps that had an influence on her feelings towards me throughout my life.
At any rate, I just wanted to say a few nice things about her. I will be taking pictures of the garden, etc., and will post some when get back to New Hampshire if I have any good ones.
posted by Skrambled Egghead Reborn @ 2:31 AM
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